What to do when life gets tough

It is easy to be positive and happy when life is going well but what about when life gets tough?

You know when you can’t seem to catch a break and things around you are crumbling. 

Between being laid off twice in seven months, my stepdads cancer, family issues, relationship drama and a racist, sexist, mysogonistic President ( I use that term loosely) who I fear will get us all killed, life feels well….shity. 

It is easy to start feeling down. To question why this is happening to me/my family/this country? 

I am not sure the answer to that. I feel that is one of life’s greatest mysteries. Why do bad things happen to good people (Like my Stepdads cancer). Its not fair. Sometimes I want to cry, I want to scream,I want to run away, I want to stop adulting and feeling pain but none of that will help in the long run. So here are some of the healthier ways of coping with the pain, when life gets tough.

1.  Let yourself feel your pain- do not try and suppress it or run from it. It will only come up stronger later.  Just feel it.  Cry if you need to, scream if you need to, sit with it, let it out,its OK, it will pass. 

2. Live in the moment, not in your head- all we have is the present moment. That’s its. Think about it,  the future is in our mind only, because when it comes it will be the present moment.  This is not to say don’t have a plan, but stessing about the future will not help. Do what you can in the present moment then let go of worry. 

3. Read or journal. Reading is a great escape for me because I cannot do other tasks, like scrolling on my phone, while I read, it causes me to be present in the moment. Journaling also helps as I tend to be an over-thinker, it allows me to sort my thoughts out on paper. 

4. Pray. Whether you are religious or not pray to whoever/whatever you believe in. Then with your work and prayer. Let go let God. Meaning trust in God or the Universe that things will work out. 

5. Be social. Sometimes when we feel down we have a tendency to isolate ourselves. It is OK to want alone time but it is beneficial to spend time with loved ones when things are tough. Laugh, reminisce and forget about your cares for awhile. Be sure to surround yourself with people who are positive and supportive. 

6. Volunteer. Go help others. You will forget about your own problems while giving back, which is so rewarding. 

7. Eat from the Earth. Your mood and energy will be better. 

8. Move your body in an enjoyable way. Don’t force yourself to do exercises you despise ( you will not stick with it). Instead walk, dance, do yoga, play with your kids at the park. Do what makes you feel alive. 

9. Laugh. With friends or alone watching shows like the Office, Golden Girls, Modern Family. Whatever makes you Laugh. As the Irish Proverb says there is nothing a good laugh and a good sleep can’t cure (so take a nap while you’re at it, life will make more sense when you’re rested). 

10. Forgive yourself and others. You did the best you could they did the best they knew how in that moment. Free yourself from the prison of unforgiveness. 

11. Bonus- this too shall pass. Life ebs and flows, don’t fight the tide, just ride the waves. 

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